Sunday, November 7, 2010


I fell off the wagon. It was slow at first, a bite here, a chip there. I'll have just a bit of rice. Some corn chips won't hurt me. But it gradually snowballed until yesterday for my nephew's tenth month birthday, I had two servings of noodles, two slices of cake and ice cream. I was consciously cheating. It wasn't mindless. It wasn't me alone in a dark room surrounded by high carb foods and the voices in my head telling me to eat, eat eat. I was with my family, socializing and destroying the healthy eating I had done for months before.

October was really bad for me. It was my birthday and we went on a trip. It was a one-week cheat that turned into a whole month of conscious cheating. I don't know why I did it. I am not sure. Maybe I thought five months of being good deserved a treat, a reward. But my reward should be that my jeans are sliding off and my tummy is flat. I was noticeably irritable, too and always napping. The signs were there but I ignored them.

It stops today. Today is another day and I will take it one day at a time. It won't be easy to wean myself off of the carbs I consumed yesterday but I will try. For accountability, I would take pictures of everything I eat. This way I can keep a visual food diary and review my day. This way it won't be conscious cheating that I forget after a few minutes. I would have proof that I can keep going back to.

Wish me luck. Again.


Lisa said...

Stick with it. I know you can do it. Just think of all the delicious low carb food that you can eat instead. Good luck!

Dee said...

Thanks for stopping by. It's a struggle at first but I know, based on experience that it gets betters. :)

Trish Cardona said...

I have my (almost) weekly conscious 'cheating' days -- I have to coz it's hard to be a mum here in Melbourne (walang katulong! waaah!). But when it's PMS time of the month, the one-day-cheat turns into 3 days, sometimes a week.

I turned 35 in November, and probably the most important lesson I've learned in life is to never quit quitting. One day, maybe the 99th time you quit (or the 999th), it will all click. And then it'll be more painful to 'go back' than to have to quit again.

Meanwhile, just keep on quitting!


Post a Comment

This blog does not allow anonymous comments. Please leave your name or your comment will not be approved. Comment moderation has been enabled. Thank you.